Are You a Good Judge of Character or a Poor Judge of Character?
There are two types of people, which side of the spectrum do you fall?
As I write today I am sitting here feeling sick as a dog. My throat is burning up, feels like I could be the model in that Vicks Kingo ad! Also, that man for sure did not represent a man suffering from a cold & flu. I’ve just popped two Coldcaps and I’m waiting for it to check in, so a part of this post might be written while I am drowsy. For some reason I thought I was immune to thee flu this time round, but it seems I am not.
So there are two kinds of people, those that are really good at judging people’s character and those that are poor at judging people’s character. Which side of the spectrum do you fall and why? I can confidently say that I am on the ‘not so nice’ side, meaning that I am poor at judging people’s character. Mainly, because I believe that people are nice when they are just nice or when they act nice. Also, I think that people are nice until they prove to me otherwise. And no, it’s not that I’m naïve, when I was younger maybe, now I am very woke. It’s just that if I am nice, I am legit nice, why act it out? And when I have chosen not to be nice, then I just won’t be. It’s black and white for me. Pretending is tiring, so it fascinates me how people do it and I am not able to tell at first. Then later I’m like, “whaaaat?”
Another thing I do is that I try to hear more than what people are saying, just so that I can know what they think of the person. Then from there I make my observations based on what they’re saying. Like if someone for instance say person x is malicious, before I believe them, I take it as a half-truth. Then over time, I will observe how person x treats me and how they treat others, what they say about others to me, because they’re most likely saying the same things about you to others. All the while not being a mean person to person x, just trying to believe that they’re still a nice person. So I also let people in, not in my private life per se, but just in my space. I talk to them, I listen to them, I laugh with them, I work with them, I sympathize with them, I help out where I can and so on and so forth.
Do I get surprised if they’re the opposite of what I expected them to be, i.e. nice? Well, if I had prior knowledge that that’s how they are and I still went ahead to form a relationship with them, I pinch my ear (it’s an African idiom that means you learn your lesson and never repeat that again). If I had no idea and I was learning about them all by myself and trying to figure them out, I still pinch my ear and deal with them from a distance, especially if it’s a person that has to continue being in my life for one reason or another.
I had really nice lunch today (had to mention) from a fave restaurant – Mediterraneo – The Junction, with colleagues. Also, I’m the type of person who orders the same food all the time.
Once I settle for a certain dish in a restaurant I like, that’s it. I’ll eat it until I tire. I’ll even pretend to check the menu for other dishes, but my heart knows. Food is life!